Traction Engine

"Sh*t! Did you see that? He must have a foot like a traction engine".

So goes the immortal line of top sports broadcaster Alan Gordon Partridge.

Take some retro players in imaginary Negrete kit and plaster a legendary comedy quote over the top, and you have a Fitba classic

That's liquid football!

Best worn whilst smashing a ball into an empty net from close range, then wheeling away fists clenched.